Getting pregnant without a man

You have almost everything: a great job, lovely friends and family and a nice house. Yet something is nagging at you, you want a child. There’s just one big problem: you don’t have a husband. How do you solve this? How can you get pregnant without a husband?

Getting pregnant without a man

There may be several reasons why you want to get pregnant without a man. What should you do when time is ticking and you haven’t found a suitable partner yet? Or when, after years of relationship, your partner suddenly admits that he or she does not want children? And what is possible when you are in a relationship with a woman? Or when you don’t feel like being a dual parent at all and you want to raise your child alone? While until a few years ago there was a great taboo on getting pregnant without a man , nowadays it is becoming increasingly common and seems to be increasingly accepted by society. But what exactly are the options?

What do you want?

When faced with the choice of an unknown versus a known sperm donor, it is advisable to ask yourself a number of questions. Important questions you will need to consider include:

  • What role do you want your child’s father to play in your child’s upbringing?
  • Do you want your child to be able to easily contact the father later if the child so desires?


Well-known sperm donor

One of the options is to find a known sperm donor. For example, you can contact a good friend or acquaintance and ask him whether he would like to be a sperm donor for you. This is of course an option where you have to be able and dare to be very vulnerable, after all you are not asking if he wants to look after your dog for a weekend. That is why it is extra important with this option that you give each other sufficient time to think about it. Sometimes an acquaintance already senses the question hanging in the air (for example, you have been in a relationship with a woman for years and you have regularly discussed a baby in the presence of the friend or acquaintance), in other cases you really surprise them with your ask.
It is wise to think carefully about the advantages and disadvantages of a known sperm donor . There are a number of pitfalls regarding the role in education. With a known sperm donor, the role in upbringing can become more acute when the father initially decides not to play a role in upbringing, but later changes his mind. Or the opposite is the case: the father has indicated that he wants to be involved in the upbringing, but in practice he never shows up at all. It is wise to put the agreements down on paper, possibly with a notary.

Unknown sperm donor

Another option is an unknown sperm donor, colloquially known as the ” sperm bank “. Until June 1, 2004, men could donate their sperm anonymously, after which the anonymity guarantee for donors expired. This means that men can only donate their sperm if they do not object to their data being registered and that their data can be provided to their offspring upon request. Parents and the GP of a donor child and the donor child themselves can request this information. Donating sperm anonymously is therefore no longer possible.
You can get in touch with an unknown sperm donor in two ways: via a sperm donor center or via an alternative route, for example by making a call on the Internet.

Sperm donor center (sperm bank)

A sperm donor center is generally part of a general hospital. You can request information from your doctor about the nearest sperm bank and the options available.

Sperm donor via the Internet

With the advent of the Internet, the independent search for an unknown sperm donor has also increased. There are various websites where you can place a call and where unknown sperm donors can register.
With such an unknown sperm donor, it is very important that both parties undergo a thorough health check, so that you are not faced with any unpleasant surprises.

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